We are working on Miguel(left), he doesn't like to smile much

 October 3, 2011

Another rough day.  I guess a normal day is a rough day here.  Each day seems more exhausting than the day before.  This morning after the kids went to school Erin and I got ready to begin building the brick covering for the generator, but on our way over there Melissa stopped me and asked if I could finish her batch of bread for her because she had to take an unplanned trip to town.  I’ve made bread at home but this was the first time to make it here.  I’m really beginning to realize that absolutely everything you do here is harder and more complicated than what I’m used to at home.  Instead of the bread machine I’m used to at home to mix up the bread, it is all by hand here.  After adding flour and kneading it for what felt like ages, I rolled it into little balls and put it on pans to bake.  Baking here is a whole new adventure: they use a huge igloo shaped dirt and brick oven out behind the kitchen.  Attached to the “igloo” oven is a fire that must be kept at a certain temperature in order to be hot enough to bake the bread.  It has to be extremely hot, but no flames or else the bread turns black.  It is quite a process to break a batch of bread, I didn’t realize how simple making bread at home is until coming here.  Another obstacle I’m trying to get used to is the whole no water on campus ordeal.  Right about the time I was getting used to showers, washing clothes, doing dishes and everything that requires water with the little spigot out behind our house… and now the water doesn’t work.  At first I thought it was just temporary, but I asked around and found out that this is what happens during the dry season (which last several months!)  Clean water is like gold now.  When the spigot isn’t working, which is almost all the time, we have to pump water from the one pump on campus.  Long lines form at the pump because it’s the only place for the over 100 people on campus to get any water.  As of now I still have some water saved from when the spigot was working, but when it runs out the only option is the pump – which often is pretty dirty water.  Another thing I’ve always taken for granted at home: water. 

           

This afternoon alone felt like a whole week.  Our kids were having major problems cooperating today.  Guerrmo causes the most problems.  He pees his bed every night so we require him to wash his blanket every day.  Today he refused to do any of his chores.  His chores have been piling up: 3 days behind in homework, wipe and sweep under the table after the meals today, clean his blanket, clean under his bed, wash all of his clothes.  When he wouldn’t obey we took him outside in the hot sun, gave him a machete and told him to cut the grass.  After a long while of watching him, and chasing after him when he tried running away he finally slowly started cutting the grass.  With no water working, washing clothes and dishes is a whole new story.  It takes the boys ages to pump all the water.  Edwin, the work director at Familia Feliz, told Erin and I this afternoon that we are assigned to help the man who is working on our new bathrooms from 1:30 to 5:30 every afternoon from now on.  The kids are back from school at that time so I think we will be trading off, one watching the kids, one laying bricks for the bathrooms.  It’s going to be a lot of work, but it will be a huge blessing to finally have our own bathroom when it is finished.

Yesterday I had a really good conversation with Missy (Melissa Harding, founded Familia Feliz 6 years ago) she is 29 and has been in Bolivia since she started the orphanage.  She is in the process of adopting her 9^th and 10^th child here in Bolivia.  Her house is at the center of campus, she is one of the directors of the orphanage while mothering and home schooling her children.  Being here for only 2 weeks now, I am in awe of what Missy has done.  It’s been such a huge culture shock for me, never in my life have I lived even close to how people live here.  It was really good for me to talk with Missy, she explained to me that coming here and living in a place like this you have to accept that it is new and different and not compare it to life at home.  It’s a new place, a new experience and it will never be like what I’m used to at home.  She is right, I can’t think of any similarities between this place and home!  She says a lot of it has to do with mindset.  I am doing my best to not have the mindset of what I’m missing here, but accept and appreciate it for what it is… it can be really difficult.  It is definitely hard to get used to EVERYTHING making you sick.  All it takes is an unwashed piece of lettuce (or even washed under the pump) and before you know it you have Salmonella.  I’m hoping I’m still in the adjustment phase and my body will become accustomed, but so far there has been very few days when my stomach hasn’t felt queasy. I am trying to get used to a whole different standard of cleanliness as well.  It is still the beginning of the journey, I continue to tell myself “one day at a time.”  I miss and love you all.  

Swimming with the Chicos :)

October 2, 2011

Today was one of the best days I’ve had so far since I got to Bolivia.  Usually Sunday’s are long days, no school and we have the kids all day long.  Today was different – we took the kids to town with us!  The boys are in love with swimming, they ask us every day if they can go swimming in the river.  We thought it would be especially fun for them to go swimming at the nice, clean pool in town.  They absolutely loved it!  For many of them it was their first time swimming in a pool.  We played there for most of the afternoon, it was amazing to swim in clean water for the first time since I’ve been here.  The boys are quite playful and sneaky.  When Erin and I were taking a break from swimming, sitting on the side of the pool they snuck up behind us and pushed us over the edge – thus beginning a massive water fight in which we had a hard time catching and throwing them in because they were so slippery!  It was a fun, carefree time with the boys.  After swimming we took them across the street to Cherries Ice Cream, the Ice Cream shop that Erin and I go to pretty much every time we are in town.  Then we headed to the Sunday market.  On Sundays the street by the river is full of different booths and little shops.  There are all sort of different stands, fruit, veggies, meats, spices, clothes, shoes, shower and cleaning supplies, and random trinkets.  We got the boys one of their favorite treats, Rice Balls.  They are round balls of rice with an egg in the middle.  I had some things I needed to find, it was an interesting situation trying to explain to the different stands that I need Bleach.  I used the Spanish word for it but maybe I wasn’t pronouncing it correctly or something because all I got was blank stares.  The boys tried to help me out but they couldn’t figure out what I was trying to find.  Eventually Jose, one of my oldest boys realized what I was looking for and he helped me find it.  It was fun having the boys along and taking them around town, it is very seldom that they get to go to town.  It was also stressful to keep track of all 8 of them going in between all the crowded stands, luckily we didn’t have any mishaps in the market.  Erin and I stopped in a little shop on our way back to meet the truck, they had Oreos and peanut M&M’s there… immediately reminding us of home!  I got some peanut M&M’s, I don’t even like them much but they are one thing here that look and taste like home so I just wanted them. Once we got back to the orphanage I could tell the kids played hard, they were all quite sleepy even before they had their dinner.  As soon as they finished dinner we put them in bed and in no time all 8 were asleep.  It was such a treat to get away for a day and spend time in the pool, it’s definitely been marked in our heads for many return trips in the future! 

Perspective

September 29, 2011

Today has been a rough day.  I continue to remind myself I am still in the early stages of this venture, yet it is difficult to not become totally overwhelmed.  All day thoughts of family, friends, home and life in the United States of America filled my mind.  It is like a completely different world here.  Time passes by so very slowly, and it’s hard not to think about home.  Today I began to realize something that I’ve always known to some degree, but was really emphasized today.  It’s amazing how many things in my life I take for granted.  At home I remember complaining when my showers are too hot or too cold or not long enough or not at a convenient time ect ect, and being here has made me realize how easy showers at home really are.  Showers are not easy in the jungles of Bolivia.  When we first moved out to our little house with the boys, I was bummed about not having a bathroom or shower, having to use the spigot out back for showers and walk to the other girls bathrooms.  Now, I am in LOVE with our little spigot out back!  Simple reason: water has been slowly running out all around the orphanage, it’s the dry season, it’s been a while since it has rained.  I just found out today that during the dry season the only place we can always count on water is at the one pump on campus, which is often dirty water.  Our spigot is a multipurpose spigot and when it’s not working it means we send the kids to pump water to brush their teeth, take showers, wash the dishes, and wash their clothes.  Tonight Erin and I had our first “shower” over by the pump… and after that experience I officially love our little spigot.  All the sudden it became a treat in my mind whenever that little spigot is working!  Later, right before bed I ran to check if there was any water yet, when I found water I immediately decided to take advantage of the water while it’s here and I took another, better shower.  Another thing that comes to mind thinking about home is how I sometimes snap at a sister or brother who turns on or off a light when I’m using it.  For example when I’m about to fall asleep I don’t enjoy a bright light being turned on by my head.  Or when I’m reading under a light I don’t usually enjoy it being turned off and the room turning pitch black.  Now I would be quite pleased to have light of any kind at any time, how nice it would be to have control of when the lights work and don’t work! These past few days there has been a strike and a roadblock up the road a ways from Familia Feliz, it is the main road that comes in toward Rurrenabaque from La Paz, Santa Cruz, all the big cities around.  Because of the roadblock gas trucks weren’t able to get through to Rurrenabaque and there has been a shortage of gas in this area.  Usually the generator only runs a few hours a day but without gas it can’t run at all, which means no electricity at Familia Feliz.  They say roadblocks and strikes happen quite often around here and we start running low on food and water too if they last long enough.  Luckily this one ended and we were able to get more gas today.  All these things just made me realize, as I was standing out back washing my hair under our little spigot, hearing the noises of the jungle and the generator working again to light our little houses – I was so happy to be showering under a spigot and to have light shining from my house.  These things that I have taken for granted my whole life felt like luxury to have at the same time.  Perspective. 

So.Many.Bugs.

9-23-11

This morning is our second morning with the kids.  We moved into our new living area two days ago.  Our hut isn’t made to be a house, I think it was originally a school classroom.  There are no bathrooms, showers or kitchen. Just the boys room and the room Erin and I are living in. In the boys room there is a table and benches that we use to eat.  There are 4 sets of bunk beds in their room. We were originally told 6 or 7 but we were asked to add another little boy to the family.  He is only 5, younger than all the other children but so far he has been pretty easy to manage.  The hard part is he doesn’t go to school so we have him 24/7. The rest of the kids go to school only in the morning, so from about 11:30 am on we have the kids. In the morning we are supposed to wake the boys up at 5 or 5:30 am, read them a worship story, sing with them, have them make their beds, sweep the floor, fold their clothes, have breakfast, wash their faces and brush their teeth before school. School starts at 7:30 am.  Most of the kids start trickling back home around 11:30 to 11:45 a.m. This afternoon Erin and I are planning on having a cleaning bee with the kids, we are going to have them pull out all their dressers, sort all their clothes and things, wash everything out and put it back neatly beside their beds. We already scrubbed down the tables and benches and got a new table cloth from town so the table is looking better.  We want to scrub the mud off the walls in the boys room too.  There are a lot of projects to be done.  Erin and I want to build a fire place that the kids can sit around, sing and we can use to cook.  We also are planning to plant a garden outside our side of the house, plant vegetables and put some flowers right by our door if we can find any flower seeds.  Last night we discovered that we are in need of a clothesline as well, Erin and I had our first laundry adventure after the boys went to bed.  We discovered the kids clothesline to be covered with little ants… which could potentially mean ants in the pants. Still thinking about how to keep the ants away from the clothesline we are going to make.  Our room is still in need of a lot of work.  Our bags are just stacked by the walls, taking up way too much room because we don’t have shelves yet to put things on.  We don’t have bed frames so our mats are against one side of the room. I’ve realized the best policy in this little house is to just leave the mosquito net on all the time.  Bugs still manage to be crawling on my bed even with this policy so I don’t want to explore other options.  Last night when I was in bed, close to sleep, I was all the sudden completely awake when I saw the biggest ant I’ve ever seen in my life crawling up the bed beside me.  I don’t think ant is really the name for the creature, but it looked like a ginormous ant with a pincher on the front and a behind that stings like a bee. Outside of my mosquito net were unending other noisy moth type animals, beetles, little bugs and cockroaches.  I was too worried about letting all those animals in I didn’t know how to get the massive ant out of my bed. I started trying to direct it down my bed with my headlamp, I think the light scared it because it started pinching and stinging the bed. I felt like a caged animal hiding inside my mosquito net trying to get rid of an unwanted creature inside the cage.  Mosquito net FAIL!  I was so thankful when Erin finally returned from the big house because she knocked off the hefty green beetle attached to my mosquito net with our hammer.  Yes, we have a hammer by our beds ready to smash any unwanted visitors. When at all possible we designate the boys to be our bug killers, but when they’re sleeping we fall back on the hammer. The noises here in the jungle are SO loud at night, now I understand why – there are bugs everywhere! 

8 Little Chicos

9/19/11

            It is 6:36 on Monday morning, our first school day and normal week day since we got to Familia Feliz.  I feel totally overwhelmed… we were told last night that today we are moving into one of the cabins (huts) to be house parents for 6 or 7 little boys.  They are around the ages of 6-9.  Basically we are responsible for the kids no matter what.  There are a few hours in the morning that they are at school, but other than that we are expected to take care of them.  I am so thankful that Erin and I are going to be together.  It’s going to be especially difficult at first because we don’t have a good handle on the language yet.  At first they didn’t want to switch us into the house with the little boys because they said “there are only 9 weeks left in the school year” and it’s hard for the kids to transition from one house parent to another.  That was like a reality check to me – “only” 9 weeks is longer than a whole summer at Big Lake… and camping at Big Lake doesn’t come even close to living here.  These orphans have a whole different way of life, it’s so very different and difficult to adjust to because it doesn’t follow any of the natural habits we have learned our whole lives in the states.  We’ve been given some tips on how to be good “house mom’s” but ultimately we are going to have to jump in and do our best to learn as we go.  Yes, I’ve grown up with ten siblings, 7 younger siblings, which I am thankful for and I hope will help me some with this responsibility … but my little brothers and sisters have not lived lives full of abuse, live in the poverty of Bolivia or speak a language I do not know.  I feel inadequate and unprepared for this responsibility, yet as I write I hear the children singing outside and it reminds me the reason I’m here.  To love these kids.  This is a huge opportunity to make a real impact on their lives.  I pray that I will have the courage and strength to be a witness and a loving “mom” to them.

First Days at Familia Feliz

9/17/11

            My first full day at Familia Feliz is winding down.  It was an enjoyable, relaxing Sabbath day.  Yesterday around 3:30 p.m. we flew into the little airport in Rurrenabaque on the 7-person mission plane.  It was the smallest plane I have ever ridden in! We had it so packed with bags that we couldn’t even see each other.  Erin, Joy Harding and Jordan sat in the back, Jamie in the middle and I sat in the front with the pilot.  I got pretty sick on the first half of the trip before we stopped in Trinidad, then after Trinidad I felt good for the most part. Despite getting sick I am glad we were able to take that plane because it only cost $80 instead of $180 to take a commercial flight, or take an 18 hour bus ride on bad roads! It was neat to meet the pilot Hermon, he is a volunteer pilot for Gospel Ministries International, originally from Michigan he has been here serving for 8 months. It’s inspiring to meet so many selfless people. It’s true what everyone had been telling us about Rurrenabaque, it is a very hot place. As soon as we got off the plane we were hit with some intense heat.  I am worried about getting adjusted to this heat, but hopefully I will adjust quickly.  We were met at the airport by Dave Harding, the director at the orphanage and several other Familia Feliz staff.  Stephanie is the director of the school and also a house mom, she is such a sweet and happy person! Edwin is the assistant director of the orphanage and also a house father, his wife Racquel I haven’t really met because she went back on the plane to Santa Cruz.  Edwin drove us to Rurre and let us get smoothies at the ice cream shop before we headed to Familia Feliz.  It was so nice to get something to eat because we hadn’t really eaten all day.  I really like Edwin! It was really fun to talk to him on the way to the orphanage, he knows some English so we could talk and he helped us learn more Spanish too.  Driving into the orphanage yesterday afternoon was touching… and a little overwhelming.  It’s definitely a different perspective coming to a place like this with the mindset of staying for a long period of time, rather than like Ethiopia just planning on staying a couple weeks.  Life is so so different here! Basic every day necessities that I take for granted at home are hard to come by here.  There are about 16 of us who are living in the upper area of the big house right now, all sharing one bathroom and shower.  There isn’t always toilet paper, the showers often don’t work and we have to go outside and bring in buckets of water to shower.  Last night when we got here after walking around and being introduced to people, exploring the campus a bit, we gathered for Friday night worship.  A cute little girl sat on my lap during worship and many children kept eyeing us curiously and smiling.  After worship was a special Friday night tradition – pizza.  It was strange tasting, it had a weird salsa for sauce.  After dinner Erin and I went to find Mr. Harding to see when we should be up the next day ect because we were tired and wanting to head to bed soon.  We ended up talking to Mr. and Mrs. Harding for a long time, later into the evening.  Jordan, Jonathan and Jamie came and talked with them too. It was a really good, eye opening talk.  I have a better feel for their mission and goals now and a better idea of what kind of people they are.  I really admire them for what they’re doing here.  They’ve given up their home elsewhere and are moving here to live at Familia Feliz permanently.  Their goal with education here at Familia Feliz is salvation for these kids above all else, it’s inspiring.  Mr. Harding also talked to us about where he thinks he wants to put us.  Apparently a lot of volunteers left near the same time, leaving a lot of holes to fill.  It sounds like he wants Erin and I to move into a house with 6 or 7 little boys to be their house moms.  Wow! That wasn’t what we were expecting!  It’s a bet overwhelming, but I think it could be a wonderful opportunity to make a difference in the lives of these kids. It was so sad to hear Mr. Harding talk about the percentage of kids here who have been sexually abused.  He said 80-90% of the kids have been abused and is shows.  He said they can never sleep together, go to the bathroom together or run off alone by themselves.  He said they will actually rape each other sometimes.  It’s so sad to think that such young, innocent kids have been  so horribly mistreated that they would behave like that.  I want so much to help them somehow!  Hopefully I can make a positive impact on their little hearts.  I want to love on them as much as I can! We also talked about what we can do to stay safe here, life is so different and sanitation we are used to back home is almost non-existent here.  It was disappointing to hear Mr. Harding talk about it as if, whatever we do, we’re bound to get sick.  He has gotten Salmonella twice, Dengue Fever, Staph infection and random other things.  Despite what he said, I still really want to try to avoid everything I can that would make me sick and just try to stay well! This year is going to be rough… a lot to get used to! And so different from home.  The kids are absolutely precious though, I love them! This morning we slept in and then went to church, it got pretty hot but it was a nice little service.  After church we helped make lunch and after lunch we piled into the old truck to go to the river! It took to trips to get everyone down there, about 5 or 6 miles down the road to the river.  It was nice, we spent all afternoon playing in the river with almost all of the kids.  It was really muddy, but we walked upstream a ways and less mud was spread through the water.  I sat in the water and talked with several adorable, sweet little girls.  One of my favorites, I met her today and her name is Liz! Couldn’t help but think of my wonderful friend at home that I’ve been missing.  Belsebet and Kailee are two other girls I played with a lot at the river.  They are such fun and sweet girls! It’s going to be nice to talk to them once I actually learn how to speak Spanish better, there’s a lot of guessing and funny looks during this stage of communication.  Before we came back to Familia Feliz we gathered around in the sandy area and sang songs together to close the Sabbath.  It was festive coming back from the river, lots of us started walking back while as many people as possible piled into the back of the truck.  Once the truck started driving past all us walkers, some of us (including me) jumped onto the truck so we didn’t have to walk the whole way.  The kids sang the whole ride back, it was fun to listen to them.  Erin had fun running back with a couple of the boys.  I felt really dirty and gross when I got back from the river. Sadly the showers didn’t have any water so I had probably one of the worst showers I’ve ever taken.  There was just a tiny bit of water in the bottom of some of the buckets in the bathroom and I had to use them to splash water on myself and quickly try to get enough shampoo through my hair and body wash all over my body.  Ohh the things you take for granted at home!  We had bread and hot tea/herbal drink for dinner and now a lot of the kids are outside playing games around the fire.  Erin and the other student missionaries are out there.  I was just talking to our friend Sarah, she got here a day before us and is from England. She has been traveling through South America for about 4 months now!! Sadly she will only be here for 5 weeks.  I wish she was staying longer!  She is really fun and sweetJ Hopefully tomorrow we will get to go into town and get internet and buy some things we need.  I need to get a mosquito net, flip flops, and adapter for my charger and snacks!  Right now I still feel overwhelmed, nervous, out of place, uncomfortable and overall not at home here… but I know it will take some time to get adjusted!

On to Bolivia!

Today is a day of mixed feelings. It is my 21st birthday and my last day in the United States before I take off on my year as a student missionary in Bolivia! I am nervous about all the unknowns this journey will bring, yet excited to see where it will take us! I am thankful to be going with my wonderful friend Erin Messinger, we're in this together! Thank you to all my family and friends who continually support and encourage me. I will miss you! Goal: to make a real impact and positive difference in the lives of the Bolivian people.